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23.05.2013 @ 23:26 - One comment

Jeffrey Campbell

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WHY I CALL BS ON FHM CALLING MILA KUNIS THE SEXIEST WOMAN IN THE WORLD

02.05.2013 @ 15:51 - 29 Comments


FHM just called Mila Markovna Kunis the hottest woman in the world. I call bullshit on that.
http://thisisprettyreal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/MILA-2.jpg

Lists are great, without them nothing in the world would make sense. Beauty, finance, boobs, record sales, dick girth -  what's the point of any of these things if we can't have a little number placed next to our name, so a magazine or website can plonk us on a league table to make us feel shitty about not being closer to the top?
FHM just called Mila Markovna Kunis the hottest woman in the world. I call bullshit on that. Which inevitably makes me part of the judgemental problem, but hey, such is life.
 
HER FACE IS PUFFY
http://thisisprettyreal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/MILA-1.jpg

Too much sleep, Mila? Not enough?  Since acting is such "hard work", it's probably the latter. I feel your pain, but it looks like you're storing food in those cheeks. And it's only gonna get worse. In ten years time, they'll look like basketballs. Or handfuls of lumpy cookie dough stuffed into flesh-coloured carrier bags. Yuck.

SHE HAS SAD EYES
http://thisisprettyreal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/mila3-684x1024.jpg
Windows are the eyes to soul and Mila's windows are miserable. Hollywood is a shitty lonely place, full of vacuous, egotistical millionaires. You can never tell if people like you for you; your movies, or your bank balance. That's gotta grate on a girl after a while.

SHE PROBABLY LOOKS LIKE A FOUR JUST AFTER INTERCOURSE
http://thisisprettyreal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/MILA-4.jpg
After a night of sweaty, intense passionate sex with the sexiest women in the world, are you ready to turn over and look at something that resembles a wet pug in a wig? Post-sex Mila probably doesn't look that hot, but at that point you've probably already ejaculated inside her Hollywood vagina. Looking at that list again might help to soothe the pain, but probably not.

I CANT GUESS HER ETHNICITY
http://thisisprettyreal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/MILA-5.gif
What are you, an Arab? Half-Pakistani? Eastern european with a sprinkling of Egyptian? Humans don't like to be confused, it's intriguing at first, but then we just feel dumb because we can't stuff you into a clear ethnic box when you walk into a room. It's even worse when we start talking to you and your voice, mannerisms and overall body language gives us no hints as to where you're from and what type of guys you like to fuck. Annoying.

SHE'S TOO FUCKING PHOTOGENIC
http://thisisprettyreal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/MILA-HOT.jpg
There's nothing worse than a girl who takes great pictures and looks great with makeup on. It's like God has given you free reign to trick my penis into falling in love with you. I know you're not perfect, no one is. So why are you allowed to look so fucking close to it whenever someone brings out a tripod and one of those little things with the expensive zoom lenses? Anyways, I'm probably just jealous - but screw you, you ethnically ambiguous cunt.

BY:
- Donald Crunk- thisisprettyreal-

love this writer so damn much, fun, fun♥
does he has a point? or are you disagree with 
what he said?